Freshly Riffed 59: That’s What Regular Folks Do, Right?

4 Dec

Welcome back to Freshly Riffed, the only web series fed through a meat grinder to create the best meat pies in London!

Problem is, we have to make sure the meats got a good shave first.

According to Captain James T. Kirk of the starship Fuck You In The Face, Freshly Riffed is where I make fun of the titles of Freshly Pressed blog posts. Also, is it just me, or is Starfleet drunk?

Each title will be linked to the original author, and remember; All mockery is for mockery’s sake only.

Ahem!

Headlines From A Mathematically Literate World

Worst porno title ever.

Is My Autistic Boy My Son?

Well, it’s either that, or he’s secretly a Skrull agent.

Ghost Trees

This is either a Syfy Original movie, or R.L. Stein got really drunk.

Or both.

I Have Seen My Past And It Scares Me

Oh, please, it’s just me as a baby- OH FUCK HE HAS A GUN.

What Is Assimilation, Anyway?

Something something something Star Trek reference.

Holidays Colliding!

Today, Thanksgiving and Hanukkah collided at Eight and Lexington.

There were no survivors.

If You Could Save Only Eight Books

I’d just save eight copies of that dinosaur erotica novel I found!

DON’T JUDGE ME.

A MODERN MASTERPIECE.

So We’ve Yet To Find A Decent World Map With South Sudan

Goddammit South Sudan get your act together.

My Week In Haiku

“I’ve been stuck in this haiku for seven days. My hunger knows so bounds. Send help.”

Vinnie’s Balls

Oh, fine, just play the song.

I hope you’re happy with yourself.

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